First Lady Jeannette Kagame cautioned those preparing to marry against investing too much energy in organizing a glamorous wedding while neglecting the real work of preparing for marriage and building a stable family. She emphasized that more effort should be directed toward equipping couples to build secure households.
She made these remarks in her speech at the Young Leaders Prayer Breakfast, a prayer gathering for young leaders organized by the Rwanda Leaders Fellowship.
Mrs. Kagame praised the Fellowship for its choice to focus on the legacy of building strong and stable families through the day’s discussions.
She noted, “We cannot ignore the worrying times we live in, where the world has embraced individualism and selfishness, with little regard for the family unit. People have adopted an ‘it doesn’t concern me’ attitude, which undermines family values, marital trust, and selfless commitment.”
She prayed for couples and their families, asking God to bless them and strengthen them.
The First Lady reminded the audience that a family is like a small Rwanda, and a little heaven on earth, which places a great responsibility on young people to build a legacy that future generations can inherit.
She pointed out that one of the reasons marriages collapse quickly is that many couples focus more on preparing for the wedding than preparing for life together.
She stated, “You must understand that building a family is more important than putting all your resources into preparing for a wedding. Couples should ask themselves critical questions: Are we marrying for love, or is it due to societal or family pressure? Is it because my partner is pregnant? Or because of the wealth we expect? We must carefully reflect on the true reasons for marriage.”
She called on young people to change their mindset and act as responsible citizens committed to transforming Rwanda, reminding them that while the country has endured dark times, they now carry the duty to safeguard what has been achieved.
She said, “You have been entrusted with the responsibility to protect what our elders sacrificed for. Continue to pursue excellence in your families without neglecting your professional duties, so that you can fulfill the dreams of those who came before us.”
She emphasized that heaven begins in the family, urging couples to critically examine societal changes, traditions, and cultures, because as times evolve, so too do marital responsibilities.
She reminded couples that superficial appearances must never replace true Rwandan values, stressing that marital vows require sacrifice and selflessness to ensure unity.
The First Lady also urged parents and families to play a greater role in preparing their children for marriage.
She said, “We must put more effort into preparing those who wish to marry. Parents and families must stand close to their children, so that we do not fail in our responsibility to raise citizens who uphold family values and strengthen the nation.”
She went on, “A flourishing garden comes from a constant source of water. In the same way, a prosperous and peaceful Rwanda with responsible citizens is the fruit of strong, united families that nurture national values.”
Moses Ndahiro, the Executive Director of the Rwanda Leaders Fellowship, recalled that National Prayer Breakfasts have been held for 30 years, beginning in 1995, and have played a role in prayer for the nation as well as knowledge-sharing across sectors.
Pastor Didier Habimana, an official at the United Nations Economic Commission for Africa, highlighted that the family is the foundation of nation-building, describing it as a true legacy.
He added, “If families are united, the world will be united. When Mother Teresa of Calcutta was asked what she would do to change the world, she replied: ‘If you want to change the world, go home and love your family.’ Building strong families is the heritage we pass on to future generations.”
He stressed that there is no justification for allowing drug abuse and alcoholism to dominate personal lives and disrupt social order.
Participants also heard testimonies from couples, especially those who had not been married for long. These included Pastor Lambert Bariho, Nadine Umutoni Gatsinzi, and the family of musician Dr. Thomas Muyombo, widely known as Tom Close, and his wife Tricia Niyonshuti.
Tom Close and his wife reflected on their 12 years of marriage, attributing their success to open communication, unity, and understanding each other’s preferences.
Pastor Bariho urged that couples about to marry should receive proper counseling aimed at building lasting families.
Meanwhile, Nadine Umutoni Gatsinzi encouraged couples to ensure that professional responsibilities do not overshadow their duty to build a joyful family.
About The Author
English